I am trying to get a 6 week old baby to sleep for more than 2 hours in a row. I am removing spit up from his clothes (and mine) several times a day. I breastfeed him about 8 to 10 times, sometimes more if he interrupts himself by falling asleep. I try to play with him and remember to speak Dutch so he will absorb the language from childhood on, even though I have sometimes trouble remembering my name, let alone my native language when I have been speaking English all day.
For the first few weeks it was just time to heal. Stay in pajamas and nightgowns and try to get through the feedings and especially the nights without walking into walls. (I literally walked into walls after three weeks of sleep deprivation.)
But now it is slowly time to try and get back to a halfway normal life. Not a pre baby life. That life is gone forever. So for now there will be no long gowns, unless they are specially designed to breastfeed. But I should not stay in pajamas or a bathrobe for the entire day, though after nine pm all bets are off! But it's not as easy now to keep up a clean appearance, let alone a beautiful and feminine one. Laundry for example. It seems more important that my husband who needs to get out of the house to work has a nice, clean shirt, or that the baby has a clean little romper after he has spit up on the three others ones he has worn today. I had the temptation in the beginning to put my own clothes at the back of the line. But then I would give my baby a smelly mommy and my husband a rumpled wife.
So now I try to have a few nursing apropriete but pretty and feminine clothes ready. Even if they are spit up on twice a day, I can wash them again. But it's not just the clothes. I noticed that I have unfortunately reverted to that painful period in my teenage years when my hair just does not want to stay nice and clean and manageable. Hormones. Plus, baby likes to pull on mommy's hair whenever it is in reach. I would almost be tempted to cut it, but I know my husband would really regret that, as would I. Yet it is another thing to adjust to. I picked up a few hairbands and am trying new styles that allow you to lean back against a chair without getting all messed up. And of course my skin has reverted with my hair and needs some extra care as well. It takes a bit of extra time that I would love to spend on other things, but the way I look will give a mesage to everyone I see every single day. It therefor should be a priority, I think. What will people see when they look at me and know I am a stay at home mother and wife? What will my husband see? I want him to see a wife who still loves him enough to want to be atractive for him. For now: clean, decent and elegant is what I am working with.